Taking the Next Step

     From My Utmost for His Highest
. . . in much patience, in tribulations, in needs, in distresses —2 Corinthians 6

This title doesn’t mean what you think.

It’s not about taking it to the next level, breaking through the ceiling, moving past your current state. It’s about taking another step.

And, you guessed it, that’s my struggle lately. In the above linked Scripture, Paul’s talking about real afflictions. He’s been beaten, imprisoned, hungry, cold… There was nothing easy about Paul’s next step.

This may surprise you, but...

I have no vision for what happens next with this ministry. The book is published and available just about everywhere, but selling about one a day (on a good week). I’m pushing these posts out. Web traffic doubled in February, but I’m not sure this is what I’m supposed to be doing.

Kids need playing with. The dog needs walking. Proposals need underwriting and I have a thousand things that need my attention. But something in me can’t not take one more step, [Tweet-this?] put up one more post, reach out to one more person who is sharing Utmost on Twitter.

I’m not even sure I’m still doing this in devotion to God. Is it pleasing to God for me to show I’m vulnerable here or strong? Does He want me to quit all this and spend more time at work? With the kids? My wife? Should I work on the next book I have in mind?

Thing is, I don’t know. Someone once asked Martin Luther about this, as in how he would spend the next day. He answered “Work, work, from early until late. In fact, I have so much to do that I shall spend the first three hours in prayer.” [Tweetable] I don’t do that. I recognize that I should, but honestly, all the stepping has gotten in the way.

From Utmost today: “The thing that really testifies for God and for the people of God in the long run is steady perseverance, even when the work cannot be seen by others. And the only way to live an undefeated life is to live looking to God.”

Lord, I’ve been busy. Too busy. I know that we’ve got a good thing going. I know that You love having me around. I know that You don’t need me to accomplish anything. And I know that You just shake Your head when I fly off to do something for the Kingdom when all You want is me. I’m sorry. I’m not sure I can, but is it enough to want to change? If I can't, is it enough to want to want to change? [Tweet] Lord, I lift my preferences up to you. I lift my pride and my wants. I want what you want. Guide my steps and make them the steps that You want me to make. And when You want me to not take another step, when You want me to wait, Lord, I want to wait. Show me how I can honor You and let none of this, not the smallest tweet or faintest smile be too insignificant for me. Let me enter Your Kingdom washing feet alongside You. I love You. [Tweet] Amen.

I love you.

#thosewhocantnot